Moving Forward After Loss — Adjusting To The New Normal
“For someone grieving, moving forward is the challenge. Because after extreme loss, you want to go back.” – Holly Goldberg Sloan, Counting by 7s
We’ve all had them–those moments when we wish we could go back in time. What we wouldn’t give for one more day, hour, or moment with a loved one we’ve lost.
Sometimes, it takes looking backward to move forward.
Wishing We Could Rewind Time
In the theater of our mind, we thread the film, rewind it, and replay our story over and over again until we hear a snap. Like the sharp, frayed edges of the broken frame, we slowly unravel as we realize our beloved isn’t coming back, and our life is forever changed.
Time continues to unwind down a long road cast in dark shadows. In our grief, we may fail to slow down for the bumps and race recklessly around the curves. It’s easy to lose our love affair with life, especially when the vehicle whose driver named Loss unexpectedly drifted over the solid yellow line and collided with us. We angrily demand an answer as we plead, “Why?” We followed the rules and stayed in our lane; it’s all so unfair.
Mourning The Loss Of A Future Together
Acceptance is slow to arrive as we mourn dreams we thought were destined in the stars. Like a bucket punctured with holes, regret and guilt flow from our pores. We took those dreams along with father time for granted. This knowledge haunts our nights, and we fitfully wrestle our demons to sleep.
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Adjusting To The New Normal
Exhausted and spent, sleep comes more easily now. With each sunrise, we slowly build strength and open our hearts to new possibilities. Whether it’s a rainbow, a butterfly, a cardinal, or a dream, signs and synchronicities astonish even the most skeptical among us, and we can’t help but smile knowing our loved one is never out of reach.
We adjust to a new normal, and each day becomes filled with possibilities. As the soft whimpers of a newborn capture our attention, we understand that a new cycle has begun and we, too, have been reborn.